It’s the Little Things that remind me of how absolutely fortunate I am. The Little Things show themselves in Little Ways, under the radar.
I will not say that I have fortune in the form of wealth or fame or material possessions. I have fortune in my family and those who come along on the journey of our life, and those who just happen across our path.
I have been stressing a great deal lately about the school and the way they continually perceive my son as difficult, though it is truly through their own lack of education on the subject of Asperger’s syndrome that keeps them that way and does not allow for them to see and know the SmallBoy that everyone else in the world knows. We had a meeting before the holiday break to determine if a District evaluation was needed for him and, though having a paper trail laid out might be helpful down the road of academia, neither my husband nor I believe that it’s necessary; his grades are wonderful and he’s improving in every area that Asperger’s typically hinders.
Tomorrow SmallBoy will have the aforementioned evaluation, assessing academic strengths and weaknesses, IQ, social skills, vision/hearing, etc. He is prepared to show them that he is fabulous and is doing absolutely swimmingly, and that the only thing he needs from the schools is a little bit more understanding for them to see the same boy that the rest of us see.
I’m not going to bore you with more chat about my feelings on the subject, nor any deeper background, because I’m certain you’d never make it to the bottom of the page.
I am going to tell you about the Little Things and why they show me my great fortune:
Conversation w/his therapist: “So SmallBoy, how are you feeling this week, as we approach the return to school from your break?”
“I feel great. I feel like a normal kid.”
HUGE Thing- definitely more than Little. I almost sobbed in the office as I listened to my child, who has struggled with his idea of how others, particularly his teachers, perceive him, who has done so much to try to educate others on how he really IS a normal kid, who has fought his own inner turmoil about feeling different, make this proclamation of self.
Blurb from communication notebook: “Wow! We’ve been having a great week back at school. Perhaps you should consider continuing your challenge.”
This was an “OH MY GOD” moment! We communicate with SmallBoy’s teachers each day about his behaviors, tests, homework, just the general day-to-day. Usually his notebook contains complaints like, “SmallBoy needs to always have tissues. Can you make sure that he has some on him at all times?” OR “SmallBoy REFUSED to take notes in class because he said it was boring.” (okay???????) As 2007 drew to a close, we issued him a challenge to be meltdown free until Christmas Break. We took that large goal and broke it down weekly, and then daily. He received 10 points for each day that he didn’t melt. At the end of each week he would tally them up. The number of points he had at the end of the month determined the reward. We had never set a specific “prize,” he just wanted the motivation. He succeeded and was immensely pleased with himself.
SmallBoy, my husband, and I all decided that we would ultimately continue this goal through the end of school – with a cumulative point total for June, and then again, broken down into much smaller, more achievable goals in the short term. We almost fell out of our seats when we read the note from the teacher. Apparently they finally noticed that he is a GREAT kiddo and just needs a little bit of a pat on the back every once in a while.
In conversation with a potential client at my job: “Wonderful bracelet. Do you know someone with autism?”
“Yes, my son,”
“I bet he’s wonderful.”
“Yes, he is, thank you.”
This harried looking mother walked into my office with her son, the same age as SmallBoy, to find out more information about what our program can do to help her son. Her child was clearly much farther down the spectrum than SmallBoy. As she looked at my autism awareness charm bracelet, I saw in her tired eyes, as she apologized for their late arrival, the same light and love that I have for my child; the love that you see in a parent for their child. I saw the unconditional love that she has for her child regardless of what anyone else sees in him. I saw that she, too, without even meeting SmallBoy, but just hearing that he has autism, knew that he was a wonderful child.
Those are the Little Things that keep me going. My family, people who “get it,” the strength and courage of my child, breakthrough moments with the school, those around me, and those who just walk through the crosswalk on our highway of life, We’re always going down that highway, and we’ll keep traveling no matter how steep the gas prices, despite the countless obstacles, potholes and detours, seeing the Little Things along the way that keep us from getting lost. Those Little Things are my fortune and they will never steer me wrong.
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